Begin Again

Laying under the blankets hiding from your eyes..
Leaving the words that needn't be spoken on the outside
Trying to ignore the pain already on the inside
I feel it in the air
As you walk away.. the tears are set free.. while im bound by my breaking heart
I have seen the love that you are..
I have felt what i wish to deny
Time and time again i throw the words to the side and run from you
I dont want to know
what you would think
I dont want to see
what you would do
If i say it..
Push it down, hide it away
Shy away from what will fulfill you
Numb to my own senses.. but not ignorant of what i can become
I can wrap myself within your existance and see nothing
I can stand outside and watch as you stand alone
But how long will you stand there waiting to get inside?
How long will you wonder what is going on inside my mind?
Im content to fall from grace
Willing to give up the good to receive the truth
Im tired of who I am..
I am ready to end.. to begin again
To speak the shameful truth
To release our souls from doubt
To stand before you
look into your eyes
hurt the man I have come to love
With or without you.. I cannot be what i had become
I was foolish with freedom
Consumed with hiding in a fantasy
Even now this glass tower must fall
Starting again
Walking out into the sea of faces
alone
waiting for a sign.. again
You walked to me on that swing when i asked for a sign
You took my hand and held it as i thought
What have i done
Unfaithful.. why have i become my worst enemy?