Sunday, September 24, 2006

Before you say Goodbye.

Nothing left to say.. brought to a whisper in your ear
Resting my head on your shoulder
Fighting the world around us..
trying to reach you before you are too far gone
Watching you stare off into the distance..
Waiting for you to see into my eyes
Waiting for you to react
Touching your skin as you avoid me
Breathing you in.. closing my eyes.. imagining you feel me there
Stop.. the room pauses
No one sees me
No one knows I am there
An Apparition of my past only wanders into the room
I touch your face.. stand before you
You look so distraught
You cant see me but you know I am there
My memory brings you pain
My presence brings you uneasiness
I kneel before your motionless body and gaze into your eyes
I remember how those blue eyes once looked into mine with gentle passion
I see the lips that used to warm mine.. I run my finger over them..
Tracing where my lips once belonged
I have crossed boundaries to show you what I want
Confessed to those closest to me..
Despite what shame I deserve.. they hold me
They know the regret.. they have lived the mistakes themselves
I was not born vindictive
I was not born without a heart
I did not come into this world wishing to hurt people with my actions
I stand on the table and scream.. I made the biggest mistake of my life
I have put the truth into your head
I have given you everything I can
But my touch no longer warms you.. it burns you inside
My words no longer comfort you.. they anger and annoy you
My eyes no longer pull you in.. but push you to look away
I have become a haunting
An unwanted memory
A name that only brings confusion
A ghost of what could have been
So I sing you to sleep.. with my wicked lullaby
Reminding you that someone who has come to love you has betrayed you
Reminding you that this life is unkind
I have become what you do not want to know
I have chased you down and lead you away
I hear my own voice.. I have never had to listen to myself so much
I am bitter to the sound of my pleas
Ive created a crime scene
Roped off for investigation..
No one is allowed in
No one is getting out
If i could change one thing.. it would be Everything
If I could say One word.. it would be Nothing
So My soul awaits your return..
still resting at your feet invisible to your eyes
Damaging to your mind
Awaiting your recognition
Pausing this life.. as I walk through my memories of you
Taking a moment to see what I am losing
A good hard look before you say Goodbye

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