Thursday, March 08, 2007

Carpe Omnis. (Seize it All)

My horoscope today..

Your March Forecast: Venus, as it edges into your sign mid-March, implies a steady build up of intense emotion. Emotion is the fuel that powers your engine. It keeps you going. Of course you prefer a happy emotion to a sad emotion, but you prefer a sad emotion to no emotion at all. Your biggest dread is that one day you will feel nothing. You always want to feel something. You need have no fear on that count - but, on the grounds that a positive emotion is preferable, here's how to be sure you enjoy your month. Stop worrying about where you ought to be or who you ought to be there with or what you ought to be doing. Trust more. All will be fine.

The thinking is worse than the doing. Always. Without exception. There are indeed, some who argue that doing is never difficult. All pain, all stress and all discomfort stems from thinking. Well, that's the theory. Like all good philosophies, it falls apart if you take the stick of scepticism, sharpen it with scrutiny and then prod about determinedly. But today, it should at least hold up long enough to support you in your endeavour to fulfil a crucial commitment. Stop contemplating. Start doing what you have to.

Basically says I am a procrastinator that thinks too much about the things i should be doing as opposed to doing them. I think too much about how I want to feel, and how to get there, as opposed to feeling it and getting myself there. Question is.. Can I get there Alone? Can I DO these things Alone? In my co-dependancy for happiness, Have I been wrong? Is accepting who I am wrong? I mean people try to *better* themselves all the time. Am I good enough The way I am? Or do I have some *bettering* to do myself?
Have I merely come to accept the hand I have been dealt? Or should I demand A fresh Deal? Should I accuse the dealer of cheating? Of setting me up for his own amusement?
Thing is, life isnt so bad, not bad at all. But then, there are a few things missing, I just assume they will come in time. When the time is right. That I will be blind sided by some great change.
I have convinced myself there are certain things I cannot do right now. But I will not leave this world before I do in fact finish them. I will Not sit on my death bed wondering what if? I would like to lie there and merely whisper *thank God*
They say 8 out of 10 people are not happy. Alright I made that number up.. But in my experience this is what I have truly come to believe. Are humans really built for happiness? Am I?
What makes me so special, that I deserve to be one of the chosen few who have learned to grasp happiness by the reins and hold on for dear life.. enjoying the ride.. never letting it go!
So in love, they say let them go, if they are yours they will come back to you. But why is it they do not say this about happiness? When you are happy, let it go, and if it comes back it is yours forever??? This does not make sense to me. I am starting to think, ok I have thought for a very long time.. When you are in love.. take it as you would happiness.. Grab it by the reins and enjoy the ride.. (for as long as it lasts) and dont let go! (as long as it makes you happy)
There is no point in missing out on the most valuable thing in life. Another person's heart.
If it is given to you.. take it. Hold it. Cherish it. Do not risk losing it. Do not waste one moment. It is a gift. Not a curse. You need to look at it as such.
When someone loves you, it is because they think you are the most wonderful person alive... and in their eyes, You are.
When someone loves you, it means they will do anything in their power to give you happiness. The happiness in this world we so eagerly crave. Guess it just comes down to, Do you really want it? Some people become so self absorbed in misery, in failure, in self doubt.. That they are given such a precious gift and they have no clue what to do with it. In fact, They are afraid of it. Afraid they will screw it up somehow, Afraid they will be dissappointed, Afraid they will Need it, Afraid.. They will lose it! So Afraid, they run from it.
If you do not know how to love yourself, then you do not know how to love someone else. If you cannot look in the mirror and smile at yourself, then you cannot look into the eyes of another and smile at them. If you cannot have faith in yourself, the person you know better than anyone in this world, then you cannot have Faith in someone else. If you do not trust yourself to do the right thing, then you do not know trust.
Find it. Find it ALL. Find it in yourself.. What do you have to LOSE????
This is Your life, Your One chance. Make the best of it with the Cards you have been dealt. Lay them down and be proud. Walk away with a loss of one simple bet and Smile.. that You realize life is not a game. That nothing is permanent. Everything can change. Even you!

1 comment:

C-dell said...

Another great post. Why did you change you layout. It really fit you. Why did you never email me back. I know it took me a while. I am a procrastinator. Sorry if I offended you.